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Tonight went to dinner with my  friend Sammy.  It’s weird how you can have a friend who is in your life who lives down the street and you don’t fully realize it till their almost moved away to attend college.  I wish I could move back time, but since I can’t move back time I’m going to enjoy the time  I have with her before she goes off to school and keep in touch via email and or snail mail. I already miss her, but know it’s going to be a wonderful adventure for her.

This weekend I’ve enjoyed relaxing, going to the powerful movie, “The Boy in the Stripped Pajamas,” going to dinner with Sammy and finishing up my wacky book called Winkie, about a teddy bear accused of being a terrorist. I’m not sure what tomorrow will bring.

Thursday night before the coffee shop party my BFF called to tell me she asked Jesus into her heart.  I have so many mixed emotions.  I know I’ve slacked on living my faith.  My mouth turns into potty mouth once in a while and I don’t pray as often as I used to.  I guess you could say I’ve become bitter towards the whole thing.  I’m so excited for my BFF. She’s so excited to go attending church again and her little boy loves going which is amazing for a now three year old to enjoy it, well the kid’s program anywyays.  It seems like her life is coming together. I think she can see how God’s bigger plan is and that even though it was painful for her to move away from family that God is in control and that He has such awesome things instore for her.

I know I need the social interaction and community that comes with church, but to go back and really commit is somewhat scary. I know I shouldn’t let the past hurts dictate what my present or future holds because that is letting the bad guy win vs showing that I’m not going to let someone else steer my spiritual emotions.  I need to decide for myself what is best for me.  I need to decide what I believe and then find a place I can call home.  I do need a real social life. I have a few friends, but work has sucked up my social/personal life.  I need to break that cycle, so I can live again vs being a hermit.


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